This I Promise You

when the visions around you
bring tears to your eyes
and all that surrounds you
are secrets and lies
i'll be your strength, i'll give you hope
keeping your faith when its gone
the one you should call, when standing here all alone

and i will take you in my arms
and hold you right where you belong
'till the day my life is through
this i promise you...
this i promise you

i've loved you forever
in lifetimes before
and i promise you never will you hurt anymore
i give you my word
i give you my heart
this is the battle we've won
and with this vow forever has now begun

just close your eyes, each loving day
and know this feeling won't go away
'till the day my life is through
this i promise you...
this i promise you

over and over i thought
when i hear you call
without you in my life, baby
i just wouldn't be living at all

and i will take you in my arms
and hold you right where you belong
'till the day my life is through
this i promise you, babe
just close your eyes each loving day
and know this feeling won't go away
every word i say is true
this i promise you
every word i say i true
this i promise you
this i promise you...

this is my all time favorite song.
i like the song coz i really wish somebody would sing the song to me. it is a dream come true to have it happen in my life. hehehehe.

anyway, just yesterday he popped up of my chat box. it is a surprise to see him be the first to say 'hi' to me. when he popped up in my window, he was actually commenting that i have got skinnier. which is correct. i did get skinnier. and thank God that i now managed to get 1 or 2 kilos fat. not bad lah. (walopun sekarang kayanya gue udah tambah kurus lagi. mungkin karena puasa. hehehe).

yesterday was a good start. we chatted. although not for long.
but the incident really made me happy. yes, i was happy. i really wish that would happen often and that would mean that we had made our friendship got back on track.
but well...

u wish!

just like the song would really be a dream come true if only someone would sing the song to me, or at least play the song to me. it would way be more than just a dream come true if only the someone is HIM.

I WISH!!!

PS: yesterday i just found out for sure that it was a big mistake that i've put my high hopes on him. he really was and is surely not into me. (which i already am aware of that! how stupid i was and am.)
he is now in a relationship.
and i would say, although very hard to say it, i am really happy for you.

:)

my... my... my...

enough for the bull shit. enough lying to myself. i finally be able to confront myself that i'm pathetic. and, from now on i will no longer deny that i am still in love with him. hikshikshiks.

last sunday i finally went to church. i met a new friend there and of course my old friends. senangnya. just after i drove out of church, a friend called. it's a she. she was just conforming the reason why she wasn't able to come to the meeting we planned.
but she also brought news about him.

SURPRISE!

This friend of mine once introduce me to a guy. a young teenage who said he likes me. i did not really pay attention to him actually. he is not my type.
anyway, she said this guy found my blog address, and i guess after reading my posts, he felt sorry for me because i am sooo drowned into him. he said he is not the kind of guy to be wait upon. and why is that??
because he's now his friend! wow!!!

i guess he knows it better than me. i haven't met the guy in 3 years now. hikshiks. he must have changed alot. and that change must not be towards me.
hikshikshiks.

anyway, what my friend told me that sunday afternoon really shocked me and took me back to the ground.
i am always trying to let him go. to forget about him. to be able to open myself to someone new. someone who would make my life livelier. and so far, i am still stuck, because i am still falling for him.

i really-really-really need to let him go.
and yet i am really-really-really still into him.

what a contradiction...