all my prayers have finally been answered. it took only 1 (one) day for HIM to answer me. while it took almost 3 years for me to pray for the answers. :)
(gak papa, orang sabar kan disayang Tuhan. hehehehe).

i finally decided to come to the party.
but the day before, i took an on leave. 'cuti pata* *ati' as i say it to my friends. i went to plaz* senay*n to pick a nice dress to go there. the reason is just becoz i don't wanna look bad in front of him, just for old time sake. ;P

i went there with 2 or my friends. D*sot and M*ria. i thank them so much for accompanying me. before i went in the venue, i asked them to hug me, just to relieve me. and it worked. i did feel a bit relief. hehehehe.

as we went in, i see that his taste had not failed him. the place is great. nice and cozy. not a big place, but nice. my friends said the food is also not bad. :) although i could not feel it. my stomach don't really feel good.
i shook hands with him and his wife. he was nice. he kissed me on both cheek. and i congratulate him. and after that me and my friends decided to stay a while to enjoy the place and the food.
the good thing is, he asked me and my friends to take a pic together. that was my 1st picture of him, although i've known him for more than 5 years. (well, that was the answer of my prayer. the hug and the pic. hehehe).

well, ya sudahlah. gue udah gak tau lagi mau tulis apa. :(
gue cuma pengen melepas kenangan gue yang masih ada di handphone gue.
with this post, i wanna let him go.
PS: dia masih loh kirim sms. cuma bilang terima kasih gue udah dateng ke kawinannya dia. hehehehe.

03/05/07
Sori br bls .Ribet kmrn gw. hp ktglan. Skrg msh lembur pdhl bsk last day.
04/05/07
Yoeh maseeh diktr.:-(
05/05/07
Have a gu wiken 2u too:-)
11/05/07
Hehehe.manusia lilin dong gw. Great day 2 u too even the weather so damn hot.
26/05/07
Thx ren. Have a good weekend 2 u :-)
04/06/07
Wow semangat skali lo. great!
30/06/07
temankyu .selamat hari jadi yesus.berkat tuk mu juga. amin. -***i/a***i/*p**.
04/07/07
Selamat hari kemerdekaan usa. :-)
14/07/07
Gw ntn lansung di senayan tar:-)... Ayo arab! Lho?!
14/07/07
Kita menang ....
Supporternya
01/09/07
Hepi wiken 2 u too ren :-)
05/09/07
Punya sebuah hari besar jugaa.:-)
24/09/07
Wonderfull week will come about 2 more weeks.:-)
28/09/07
By bon jovi:-)
20/10/07
00:02
Hepi bday ren.best wishes for u:-). May your bday bring you much much luck!
-***i-
31/10/07
Virgin
08/12/07
Iwish. But now in d meeting . Enjoy ur wiken too!
25/12/07
Met natal ren. Semoga Berkat natal bikin lo happy. Dan liburan ke solo berjalan sukses:-)..
23/01/08
Thankyou. :) .. Good morning!
07/02/08
ro**alyn semoga sukses ditahun tikus tanah. Mau tau nasib kamu? Dari pewaris wong kam fu.untuk ZODIAK Ketik (spasi)PWKF (spasi) ZODIAK anda Atau ketik (spasi)PWKF (spasi)SHIO anda kirim ke 9800.
13/03/08
Hi... Good..good.., gooooood..,
23/03/08
Selamat memperingati hari kebangkitan yesus kristus!
31/03/08
Hai kawanku bintang cosmogirl.
11/05/08
12:15
We would like to request the honor of your presence at our wedding reception on saturday. may 17**, 2008 at 6.30pm @k*mbang go*la restaurant. Plaza sentral parking lot jalan jendral s*dirman kav. 47-48 jakarta. ::****i(***i) & yuli* ::
11/05/08
19:55
Thx ren.Ill send u d invitation by email. In case d inv card doesnt arrive on time. :)
19/05/08
21:29
Terima kasih atas doa restu dan meyempatkan diri datang meramaikan resepsi pernikahan kyu dan y*lia. God bless you all.:-)

and with these messages i say good bye to him.
he will always have a place in my heart.
congratulation p**i.
:)

this is it. i finally have to face it.

on sunday, at my utmost busiest day of my day, in the middle of my most ribet shooting, in the middle of briefing of my rese-est client, he sent me the sms.

we would like to request the honor of your presence at our wedding
reception on saturday, may 17th, 2008 at 6.30 pm @ k*mbang go*la r*staurant.
Pl*za sentr*l p*rking lot jalan J*nderal s*dirman kav. 47-48, jakarta.
::and**(***i) & y***a::

it was a blow on my sunday. but i did not break down as i imagine i would if i ever had that kinda message. one thing i should be grateful of, is that that message came to me on that perfect moment. i imagine if only that sms came to me yesterday. i would certainly run to the toilet and cry with no sound.

i called my best friend. we talked for about 25 minutes. she was as shock as i was when she read my forwarded sms. and the one thing i remember is that she said this beautiful prayer for me. she prayed that God would help me find someone to replace him.
my reply was, i hope God hears her.
(Dear God, i still believe you... trully!)

speaking of prayer, i absolutelly thank God for blowing this thing to me in the right moments. the thing came to me gently. first i hear a news from my best friend that he is already going out with one special woman. then, i hear another blowing news from a friend that cares. the message made me cry. the next thing is that when i was checking my faceb**k, i saw them happy together. it was a peek of their pre-wed picture.
i was sad when i saw it. but surprisingly i did not cry...
and now, the last message from him is the final one. the peak of my misery (halah!) ;)

well, again i need to emphasis i did not cry at the moment. but i did take revenge to myself. i beat myself till i'm so very tired. i watched a movie with one of my best friend. nice one actually. :)
but then at nite, i did cry. so hard untill i could not breath. silly...
the next day i promise myself i would smile. and i did. i smiled untill the nite, i watched movie (again) with 2 friends of mine in Jakarta Theatre, i remember him. i remember the time when we used to go to the movie to kill time together. having late dinners just so that we could chat... there on that place...
then on my way back home, in the taxi i think about him (again). and i got soooo sad. but still i can't cry. well, i never think that my cry could be loud enough to let relieve me. and i think that's just the reason i don't wanna break down.

you know, ever since i knew him, i always pray for him. (and God you it better than i do). i always pray for him to be happy. and as i receive the news, i should also be happy because this is the answer of my prayer. he is happy now with his chosen wife.

and now that he is happy, i sure think it is now my turn to be happy.

:)